Women (Al-Nisa’)

Commentary

(a) Undoubtedly, the successors of a deceased person have the right to inherit his property. But his widow is not to be treated as a part of the inheritance and exploited as the successors decide. Property is inanimate and therefore without feeling, and, as such is a proper object of inheritance, but human beings have sensate, independent existences, and therefore possess the right to decide their future according to their own choice. If there is any physical or temperamental shortcoming in a woman, it should be tolerated so that she may have the opportunity to use her other natural talents to play her part in the building up of the household. One should overlook the unpleasant aspects of her personality and try to adjust amicably. The secret of the progress and solidarity of any family or society is that its members should ignore the shortcomings and deficiencies of each other and give everyone the chance to exercise his or her abilities. Those who adopt the way of patience and tolerance in this world for the sake of God, are the people who will be granted admission to Paradise in the Hereafter. When one does not like one’s life companion and, rather than be tolerant, decides to separate, it often happens that one exaggerates the shortcomings of the other to justify one’s decision. Allegations are fabricated so that the weaker person should become nervous and leave. Similarly, while severing the marriage bond, trumped up reasons are presented to the other party. But these activities are against the covenant. A covenant is considered sacred by God and whether written or unwritten, it is essentially binding. It applies equally to both parties, leaving them no choice of their own. (a) The maxim ‘the past is past’ relates not just to marriage, but stands out as a general principle of wisdom. Whenever any change takes place in life, whether at the family or the national level, many affairs of the past, looked at by modern standards, appear to be wrong on all such occasions. Orders based on things which have now become irrelevant give rise to innumerable problems. The right approach is, therefore, to forget the past and direct one’s efforts to reforming the present and future. The advice in verse 19, ‘if you dislike them, it may be that you dislike something which God might make a source of abundant good’ may appear here with regard to the relationship between husband and wife, but it is a form of general guidance as well. It is commonly found that the Quran, while giving guidance on a specific matter, also sets forth profound advice of a general nature which may concern a human being’s entire life. Living collectively is an essential condition for human life in this world. No one can survive alone. However, due to the variations of temperament among individuals, some irritants inevitably crop up. In such a situation the only practicable approach is to ignore complaints, avoid friction and endeavour to maintain peaceable relationships. It often happens that one detects some shortcoming in his companion and becomes annoyed with it. Instead, if he ponders over the matter, it will be evident that there are few situations which do not have their unfavourable aspects. Adversities sometimes become a test of patience; sometimes act as a stimulus to turn to God in repentance and sometimes their very vexing nature teaches an important lesson.